To my 10 (almost 12) beautiful nieces and nephews, I want to start by saying, I love you something fierce. I have felt so blessed to be your aunt, to see you grow from little babies to beautiful kids with hearts of gold. You each inspire me daily, make me laugh, and teach me things far beyond your years. In fact, I love you as if you were my own. I am sure my friends both here in India and at home are tired of me sharing stories of you being cute, stubborn, or straight up hysterical, but that won't stop me from talking even when no one is listening. I hope you know that you are never far from my thoughts, you are actually very central to my daily routine.
There are so many things I wish I could tell you guys, but seeing as you range in age from 2 to 8, some of the things I pray for, hope for, long for, for you might not make a ton of sense. I want you to know that being away from you for the last 6 months, has been one of the hardest things for me to do. Sure I miss family gatherings, church services, my friends and my bed, but you are at the top of the list. I wish I could fully explain to you what I am doing here and what this year means to me, but someday you will, and then it will all make sense. I am so thankful for your mommies and your daddies, your grandma and grandpa, and all of our family who are telling you about me, so that you don't forget who I am when I return this December. I am so happy to have the notes that each of you wrote me before I left, encouraging me daily. I hope you know that I am learning so much, and I can't wait to share it with you in due time.
What does me being in India have to do with you? Well, I wondered the same thing for a bit, and while the sole purpose is following God's call in my life, and working in an area I am so passionate about, at the root of it I am finding there is more. I hope that the courage I have grown to be able to face this year is transferable to you, that you too may feel free to follow your dreams and God's plan wherever it may take you, whether it be to stay in New York or to live in Japan. I pray that the internal strength that I am fostering, will be evident to you so that you too can face scary things in your life, things that may seem impossible. I pray you see my love and dedication to Christ, the one who made us and sustains us, so that you too may walk in His will, and grow closer to Him. It's not easy missing birthday parties, family get togethers, and major milestones, but if it means that I am becoming a better me than in the end it is worth it. I want to be the best me so that I can share it with you. I want to be your fun crazy aunt, who lets you eat too much sugar, and stay up way too late, but I also want to lead you, to show you that God's plan is the perfect plan, I want to offer you the best of me in order to help you grow into the best of you.
So when you tell me to come home because you miss me, or you ask me if we can have a sleepover, the answer is yes. So many yeses but it will just have to wait a few more months, for God has called me to be here to further His call for justice. God has called me to be here to fall deeper in love and need with Him. God has called me to be here to realize that my worth is in Him and He is the only comfort zone I need. I will be so ready to come home to see you when God calls me back to Cohoes, and it's you I look forward to seeing most. I can't wait to be another great example of God to you, and to join your parents and our 'tribe' in raising you into the Godly young woman and men I know you to be. So I am sorry I am not there right now, and I know it feels like forever, but soon sweet wee ones I will be home loving you with so many hugs you will want to get away from me, but for now I must continue on this part of my journey.
And little ones, if you have a dream to travel the world or to stay at home they are both so important, I hope that along with your parents direction in following Gods call, mine is another example. I hope you know I am loving my time here, I am making friends here, and letting my roots grow here, but I am never far from you, you're always on my mind.
I love you, Bubby
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